Its the end of another decade and time to make those _"so-called"_ resolutions which don't last for more than a month. What can we do differently that the todo things in your bucket-list get checked off as well rather than add-only.
Are you keen to reinvent yourself this year? Or at least use the new year as a long overdue excuse to get rid of bad habits or pick up new ones?
Yes, it’s that time of year again. The time of year when we feel as if we have to turn over a new leaf. The time when we misguidedly imagine that the arrival of a new year will magically provide the catalyst, motivation and persistence we need to reinvent ourselves.
Having someone we can turn to for support can make setting New Year's resolutions significantly more enjoyable and keep us motivated and accountable. That said, although the support we receive from friends has the potential to be hugely influential, not all types are created equal. Some can even be quite counterproductive. There is an age-old age which goes -
A friend in need is a friend indeed.
Having a friend who's there to listen to our experiences and give us a healthy dose of realism when we’re being excessively hard on ourselves can offset some of the emotional burden and make it easier to persevere. When expressed in a compassionate way, our friends can be the voice of a reason and a positive force for change. It's also typically much easier to be kinder to and more patient with someone else than it is ourselves. Gently pointing out the moments when your friend is being hard on themselves has the potential to support them and help you develop a similar style of self-compassion over time.
Teaming up with a friend can make setting resolutions significantly more enjoyable and rewarding. If you have similar goals, focus on competing with yourself, instead of each other, so that feelings of envy don’t creep up. The only thing you have control over if your own behaviour. Take responsibility for your own success, not your friend's, and you'll be much more likely to succeed long-term.
It also helps to remember that social experiences can be goals in and of themselves. Setting a secondary social goal that's compatible with your New Year's resolution, like making a new friend, seeing old friends more regularly, or becoming a better listener can make it easier to stay consistent with the smaller steps that support your resolution. Make it a priority to spend more time with a friend and team up for a weekly walk so you can meet your resolution of spending more time outside. Practice approaching someone new in the hopes of making a new friend when you're at the gym working to improve your physical health. Having a compatible social goal can give you the extra boost you need to get the job done and also help you to appreciate the process, not just the end result.